If you hadn’t guessed by my lackluster title to this review I’ve not been fan of the main Star Wars line for some time (say around the start of the Rebel Jail arc) however I gave them a chance to make Star Wars more then just fan-service drivel that’s only being written to show fanboy dreams that in their minds would sell more books…
I’ll say it… I hope I’m wrong. I hope the number’s take a tumble this time and this issue is a prime example of a book that’s putting scenes (not art mind you) for fan-service ahead of a good story. More and more the Rebels seem to be the favorites of the Galactic war with each issue and it seems by the time of Empire Strikes back (Ep V) the Battle of Hoth was more of a last stand of the Empire ala the Battle of the Bulge rather then a crushing defeat of the Rebellion. Seriously the Empire must have been on it’s last legs by the time Vader sent Veers down to take out the shield generators and maybe that’s why the Rebels figured they’d only need 2 starfighters per Star Destroyer and let the snowspeeders deal with the AT-AT’s they were winning so much they were overconfident.
But… as well read and well versed Star Wars fans know this was not the case. This was NOT EVEN CLOSE to being the case.The Rebellion pulled off the underdog victory at Yavin but got pummeled left and right for the next 3 years running and gunning from the Imperials hence when the Empire shows up at Hoth do they decide to call in allies to help fight them off. Do they figure they’ve had such an easy go of it since Yavin they’ll through back the Imperials themselves?
No… George will tell you they didn’t. They were running from the Empire’s might, running and if paused for more then a few moments would be crushed under it along with the Rebellions Alliance.
Seems Aarons has forgotten this when he writes things. Sure I’m sure some terrorist rebel loving fans thinks “Wow CooL! Luke & Leia and Han on a Star Destoryer Bridge ! Wow Han wants to be captain of it!”….
… (cleans out his ears)…
….. ….. …. captain of it …. …. ….
So let m get this straight. Imperials think the ship has its hyper drive about to overload and because of the breach no ones able to deactivate it. So they abandon ship… now. Lets go into the way-back machine mind you.
Most navies even in modern day.. hell forget modern day think 30 – 40 years ago in the 70’s and 80’s had computers on their capital ships ala Flat-tops aka Aircraft Carriers. When a crew has to get off a ship for anything hell not even the crew if staff have to leave there are codes and commands that lock a ships command stations thus preventing anyone or anything from making a situation worse.
So in this issue we get literally the three – stooges for the Imperial command officers one that has an eyepatch even though we’ve had an ISD captain/imperial officers with an eye-issue a whole lot and even as recent as the NEW canon as you can find an imperial officer with an eye that’s different or unique for them…
scared: Lando series (some Isd captain that shoots himself)
monocle: Darth Vader series (Tanoth)
Red-monocle with scar: Smugglers Run (Alecia Beck)
just to name some from the top of my head…
… ok so character design gaff aside (yes it is…. no really it is… YES it is!) I can let the fact that this guy uses an eyepatch and lies about how he lost the eye,… probably because he’s such a bumbling fool he dropped his spork when eating his beefaroni and it bounced and stuck in his eye like John Cusack from Hottub Timemachine.
whew…. ok so…
putting all the fail safe’s even a science vessel would have (looking at you Khan) I can’t understand why if the Rebels ejected the overloading hyperdrive why the hell didn’t ANY of the imperial officers or bridge crew think of that as a fail safe in case they cant get it stopped.. they said the entire section was spaced,.. but it was apparent they weren’t since the one imperial engineer was there to actually get to the overloading hyperspace drive… and could have fixed it…. which he didn’t… which the imps never got found out… via Luke pistol whipping the guy who actually saved the ship.
Plot holes that bad hurt my car’s axel. So ok.. for some reason these incompetent officers aren’t able to stop the overload… don’t think to eject the hyper drive and they just let the Falcon land even in the middle of an all out evac to abandon ship, no one thinks hmmm maybe we should stop or shoot at the old YT freighter? Nawww we need to get to a shuttle/something else because it couldn’t possibly be anything important that one of the MOST WANTED SHIPS IN THE GALAXY happens to get into our hangar while an evac is ordered just after an attack.
*breathes …. *
So… the rebels end up ejecting the overloading hyper drive and I guess then re-leaping somewhere else? I mean even if the hyper drive overloaded a MILE LONG vessel would still be able to be seen so I assume the small band of Han, Leia, Luke, Sana, Chewie + gang got control of the bridge and leaped it somewhere on the backup drives? This isn’t Star Trek guys no one is not seeing that… remember ties and evac personnel were bugging out.
No on thought to lock down a control station ? No one thought hey lets put things into an evac coded alert like any normal ship in the 1980’s would have had?
So.. there you go fan bois of terrorist farmboys and rogue traitor princesses and villainous pirates. They have a Star Destroyer… thanks to horrible imperial officers and … no thanks to bad writing… yes, bad. Aarons has mailed in some other doozies (i’m looking at you Rebel Jail and Nar Shadda arcs) but c’mon man… this was.. not good, maybe it’ll .
So… I suppose they’ll try to use this fanservice situation of the heroes on a star destroyer to use it as a Trojan Horse maybe? Because that hasn’t been done a thousand times. Well the issue ends with the Imps finding out Vader wants to talk to them about loosing the ISD and the commander asks for a pistol because he’s going to kill himself rather then wait for Vader to do it.
*shrugs* If he was that incompetent I’m surprised Vader let him live this long…
Stooges aside I need to make a case for clarity’s sake. Story Arcs… remember them? Remember when they were more then just 4 issues? Remember when Star Wars was called an “epic saga” and we loved the way it played out with the characters and storylines? We’ve gotten what 1 good engrossing storyline with other sub characters that weren’t ended with fan-service crap. Seeing Leia and Han and gang all use lightsabers on Nar Shadda was cringe worthy at best at worst its saying “we dont need plot .. look everyone gets a saber!” as for the Rebel Jail arcs, that was just… no. So now we’re riding along in an ISD.. that is basically a mini-base in the sky guess the rebels wont need to use Hoth now! … ugh.
Stories of myth and legend, well fleshed out characters and intriguing plots.
Where has that gone?
Well as you can see my opinion of the story as for the art…
I have to say at least Molina’s line work was decent and while the exact faces of the heroes are stylized we get a good sense of who they are by costume design. The ships were ok but the Ties were a little small for the solar arrays. The other issue I have with the book is the colors many are just flat washes over geometric shapes like a color by number pattern on some of the panels. Occasionally the colors would show some depth to the line work but other times it seemed like they were more rushed. But its something I can live with.
So for a final grade it’s getting a 4 of 10. And I’m a Star Wars fanboi homer…
Will I stop buying this title? Man after reading this I have to really question it. Darth Vader’s title is ending so I may have to purchase them to stay in the universe.. but dam it’s taxing on my brain.